Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Noah's diver story

Noah has added lots of interesting detail to his story too.  If you like it please leave him a comment.



Ben the deep sea diver jumped into the deep cold blue water looking for gold and treasure. He was wearing a snorkel an some flippers.  He saw an octopus sitting on an old sandy box.  As he swam to it the seaweed swirled like a swirling snake in the black cold sea.

Ben swam through the black swirling water and sneaked behind the cold grey rocks.  He went to the octopus and tried to pull the sticky tentacles off.  Then the octopus turned around and Ben saw his mean black eyes.

Ben tied the octopus long sticky tentacles into a big round knot, it was like a ball.  He pushed the octopus as hard as he could.  He pushed and pushed until the octopus slipped into the deep cold sea.

When Ben opened up the treasure box he saw sparkling gold.  It sparkled in his eyes and made him almost kiss it.

By Noah.


video

5 comments:

  1. Hey Noah,

    That writing just looks like a year 5 writing.
    You just work really hard! That was a really nice story.
    Did you make it up? If you did, well you should be an author.

    KEEP IT UP NOAH!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hey Noah That writing just look like a year 5 writing Noah.KEEP IT UP NOAH!!!! by samoa.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hey Noah! My name is Ashley and I am from Mobile, Alabama, in the United States. I just read your story about Ben the diver and thought it was amazing!It was so descriptive I could imagine everything as if I was there. Good job and Keep up the good work!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Noah

      I loved your amazing clear voice great work.

      from Sean

      Delete
  4. Wow Noah! I've just found your story and I'm sorry I didn't see it before!
    Your description made me shiver with goosebumps as I read it. Fantastic work son. We're proud of you.

    Love Mum and Dad

    ReplyDelete

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